And the saga continues..
Sleep is there, but without any quality. I have this twitch in my eye which persists.
Thankfully, I'm still able to function but I'm worried about this continuing. I know that this will only get worse the longer it lingers. "Blurry Mind" gets a new, extended meaning these days.
Taking sleeping pills did cross my mind. However, I know that the sleep you get with these is not too great either, and the effects of it follows you through the day after.
My stress comes from several possible reasons. One of which is that this is the month of my brother's death, 3 years ago. The memorial has come and gone, and a bicycle trip in his memory is coming this friday.
I'm writing a few words for it, words I didnt say at the memorial. Sometimes it feels like words are all I have left.
Some times it feels like in a movie. You know those scenes where a person stands still or does things at a normal rate while the world whizzes by him at an accelerated pace? I feel like that some times.
Trailing off - that's another part of sleep deprivation. Wish me luck. I hope I'll get some rest tonight.
2 comments:
Oh Oren.
Your situation is so dear to me. Don't know why I say this, but your humanity's near, yet a couple of months old! I hope you've gotten relief - that your brother's death has only grown more meaningful. (Meaning has a way of being *so* personal, *so* intensely bittersweet ...) Please know that every person alive, shares this with you.
- Andrea
My brother's death will never lose nor diminish in meaning to me. I sure hope that not every person alive will or does know the meaning of having a sibling die in his/her prime.
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