Direction

How do you find a direction in life? how do you make decisions? and most importantly, how do you know you made the right decisions?

Someone once told me there are no wrong decisions. Any decision, eventually leads to something, and so you keep moving in your dynamic life (unless of course that decision leads to death).

Do any of you talk to god? I don't talk to him, but I try and find some higher guidance. From within my head. If god is energy, and matter is also made of energy, then god is in everything. Myself included.

So far, no answers. Still waiting. Searching, asking, moving slowly through life.

The same person told me, that no decisions leads to something as well. And in a hand writing test I took some years ago, I was told that decision making is a big issue with me. Duh.

Is it the fear of resolve? Is it just my somewhat transient character? Always had a difficult time telling.

Focus

I have always found it hard to focus, whether it's at work, studying, or even reading a book to its end - mostly non-fiction books or school material.

Most projects and ideas I had, I didnt finish or gave up on before even starting.

Lack of focus, no concentration, inability to stay "on the ball". My life has been rulled by these issues.

It went on like this for years. Try as I did, with academics, I didnt have the stamina, or patience to study for long, and things I did understand in the classroom didn't hold from day to day.

Never had the patience to sit and do homework for too long. And that is a real dumper when it comes to university studies.. (or any studies, come to think of it)

Last friday, I went and did a test for ADD/ADHD called T.O.V.A

As the test had shown, and as I already figured, it seems I have some form of ADD.

It's good in my eyes, this diagnostic, since it explains my history, as well as offers several routes for treatment and addressing of the problems I had and still have.

It opens a whole range of possibilities to me, leaving me with the decision - what and if I should do something with this knowledge.

This time I can no longer chalk it all down to lazyness, or lack of interest, or anything else. It all comes down to me.